{"id":10509,"date":"2022-07-13T07:27:41","date_gmt":"2022-07-13T07:27:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/madd.org\/tennessee\/?page_id=10509"},"modified":"2022-07-13T07:56:13","modified_gmt":"2022-07-13T07:56:13","slug":"poetry-by-victimssurvivors-of-impaired-driving-crashes","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/madd.org\/tennessee\/poetry-by-victimssurvivors-of-impaired-driving-crashes\/","title":{"rendered":"Poetry by Victims\/Survivors of Impaired Driving Crashes"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Many victims\/survivors find journaling to be a helpful tool for processing the overwhelming feelings that come with grief and traumatic loss. Out of that process, or sometimes in a completely alternate activity, many find a voice in poetry that best expresses their deepest emotions. This poetry may be very personal \u2013 something not meant for anyone else \u2013 OR it may be a way of talking about something too difficult to discuss conventionally, where healing can be found in sharing it.<\/p>\n\n

At MADD, our goal is always to provide ways for the victims\/survivors of impaired driving and underage drinking to heal, to provide them support through the pain however we can, and to encourage them that life can eventually be good again. With that in mind, we\u2019ve created this space where we can share the poetry of our Tennessee victims\/survivors. We hope that it will help them to have a place where their poetry can be shared AND we believe it may help a fellow victim\/survivor who reads it to realize that they are not alone in their grief.<\/p>\n

If you would like to submit a poem for posting consideration, please send it to tn.state@madd.org<\/a>. Feel free to include the name of your loved one, crash date info, and\/or a photo if we do not have one on file.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Poetry Submissions by Victims\/Survivors of Impaired Driving Crashes<\/h4>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cChanges\u201d
\n<\/span>The day starts like any other day.
\n<\/span>We will be changed forever, by one knock at the door.
\n<\/span>My youngest daughter tells me the police are here.
\n<\/span>My mind is racing and wondering why.
\n<\/span>The officer speaks.
\n<\/span>My brain cant comprehend their words!
\n<\/span>The air leaves my lungs with a horrific scream!
\n<\/span>Heart stops!
\n<\/span>Legs give out.
\n<\/span>I fall to my knees screaming for my baby girl!
\n<\/span>A Mother should never have to identify their child\u2019s body!
\n<\/span>Friends there with love and support.
\n<\/span>Without them I\u2019d be totally lost!
\n<\/span>Broken, Bruised and Mutilated they stole her outer beauty away.
\n<\/span>Her rosy red cheeks turned to grey.
\n<\/span>Arrangements made.
\n<\/span>Date is set.
\n<\/span>Time has come for Friends and Family to say their last goodbyes.
\n<\/span>I watch as everyone leaves one by one.
\n<\/span>I feel no comfort or peace inside.
\n<\/span>It is now my turn to say my last goodbye.
\n<\/span>I can\u2019t make the words come out.
\n<\/span>This isn\u2019t real!
\n<\/span>It has to be a horrible dream.
\n<\/span>My mind is racing what she must have been thinking and feeling.
\n<\/span>As I look down at my precious girl,
\n<\/span>all I can think is why her instead of me.
\n<\/span>I am blinded with this enormous amount of hatred and no will to go on.
\n<\/span>Then I remember, I\u2019m not the only one going through this pain and loss.
\n<\/span>I try to console my little girl but she is inconsolable.
\n<\/span>My mind is racing
\n<\/span>I am lost in my head and unable to think.
\n<\/span>The Murderer who stole her life away will go on to have another day.
\n<\/span>My mini-me is gone forever and I have nothing left.
\n<\/span>I am brokenhearted and empty inside.
\n<\/span>All I want now is to be with my  babies.
\n<\/span>Ones in Heaven and my youngest baby is so far far away.
\n<\/span>Whatever God has planned, its out of my hands.
\n<\/span>I will never understand why this has happened to our family and to all the families past, present and future.
\n<\/span>I do know one important fact.
\n<\/span>We are all in this club and we are MADD!!!!
\n<\/span>Think before you drink!<\/span><\/p>\n

Vicki Kirk, January 2019
\nMother of Angie Michelle Kirk<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Angie Michelle Kirk, age 21, killed May 28, 2017, by a drunk driver<\/figcaption>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\u201cUntitled\u201d
\nI stand at that place and stare at the ground,
\nI imagine you sleeping,
\nNo movement, no sound.
\nI look above me, but no longer ask why.
\nI just close my eyes and try my best not to cry.
\nI have finally accepted a Mother\u2019s worst fear.
\nBut each step is painful through my first bereaved year.
\nIt\u2019s your name inscribed on the marker I see,
\nThen tears fill my eyes because it should have been me.
\nI\u2019ll walk through this life, some sorrow, some joy,
\nBut keeping my head up for my baby boy.
\nA smile on my face, but broken within,
\nGod give me strength until I see you again.<\/p>\n

Mandy Robinson Larson, February 1, 2017
\nMother of Nick Willhoit
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Nickolas Willhoit, age 21, killed July 31, 2016, by a drunk boater<\/figcaption>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\u201cYou Step\u201d
\nWe step\u2026
\nAnd find ourselves new parents of a wonderful baby boy.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we called everyone to let them know that our little boy had taken his first steps.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd suddenly we are taking you to your first day of school.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we are watching you start Cub Scouts and how excited you are.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we are watching our switch hitter get his trophy from playing baseball.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we are watching you get awarded your Arrow of Light.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we are watching you suddenly attending high school.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we laugh as you say something in Japanese and we say \u201cHuh?\u201d
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd suddenly you were graduating high school early.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we watch you begin college.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd suddenly you are soaring, having earned your rank of Eagle.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd so soon, we see our boy becoming a man.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd you\u2019ve graduated college with an IT degree, just like me.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd we watch you walk on air, sharing love with a beautiful girl named Bri.
\nYou step\u2026
\nAnd all too soon, you are Dancing with the Angels.<\/p>\n

Jeffrey S. Garner
\nFather of Jeffrey S. \u201cScotty\u201d Garner, II<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Jeffrey \u201cScotty\u201d Garner, II, age 25, killed May 18, 2017, by a drugged driver<\/figcaption>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\u201cGrief\u2019s Silent Battle\u201d
\nAs I lay here in the bed
\nI\u2019m screaming, screaming in my head!<\/p>\n

I want you back
\nBegging God to backtrack<\/p>\n

What kind of man would you now be?
\nIf only, if only I could see<\/p>\n

What would you look like, long or short hair?
\nOpening my eyes to find you smiling in your favorite chair<\/p>\n

To clearly hear your sweet deep voice
\nSaying, \u201cSorry Mom, sorry for my choice!\u201d<\/p>\n

Why did I bury you at age 19? Always my baby\u2026
\nGod must want me to share your legacy<\/p>\n

Worlds collided that fatal day on Highway 47
\nBut I thank the good Lord, KNOWING you\u2019re in Heaven!<\/p>\n

An exhausted calm finally mumbles around in my head
\nAs I lay here, silent tears tumble onto the bed\u2026<\/p>\n

I love you, Cole Kilgore
\nYour Momma \u2013 Forever and Always,<\/p>\n

Kathy Kilgore Beeler, September 1, 2012<\/em>
\nMother of Cole Kilgore<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Cole Kilgore, age 19, crash June 4, 2011; died June 5, 2011, killed by a drunk driver<\/figcaption>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\u201cGrief\u201d
\nThe waves hit me with great force \u2013 I waver and I bend, yet I do not fall. Each wave stings a little more as it slams into me. The fury of the winds cut through me like a knife. Every cell of my body is silently screaming from the pain. It is so loud; and no one can hear it but me. Do not look at the waves, I tell myself; for looking at the storm gives it power, do not give power to the storm; look away, look away. Do not allow the storm to overtake you or you will die. But it is everywhere, it surrounds me, it is all I can see. I struggle to regain my focus \u2013 It is a constant battlefield. Finally, I am able to look past the storm and I can see You. I do not fall because I am standing on the Rock; I will not fall because the Rock protects me as the waves and the winds try to destroy me.<\/p>\n

Carry me Lord when I cannot carry myself, give me strength when I have none, give me determination when I feel like all hope is lost, give us justice, give me peace from the storm that rages in me. I cannot lose my focus, no not now, not ever. I am standing on the Rock and I will not be moved. My eyes may temporarily see the storm around me, but I will always refocus and stay fixed on You.<\/p>\n

Calm the storm Lord, if only for a moment so I can catch my breath.<\/p>\n

Tammy Leonard<\/em>
\nMother of Kassidy Leonard and Grandmother of Kimberlynn Griggs<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Kassidy Leonard \u2013 age 19, William Griggs \u2013 age 20, Kimberlynn Griggs \u2013 age 12 days, all killed October 12, 2015, by a drugged driver<\/figcaption>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Many victims\/survivors find journaling to be a helpful tool for processing the overwhelming feelings that come with grief and traumatic loss. 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